Decision is important

Today I was feeling crazy. I mean, its what I've been calling crazy these days. Just divided is all. Sharply so. I thought to myself, these are my two sides. I felt them so clearly, it was real to me, not like multiple personalities, but more than just, like, "oh, I can't make up my mind." I don't know if everyone has this going on with them, or maybe, everyone has two sides like me, and mine do not agree and that is why I can feel them. Its really nice when both sides of me agree. Its cake, life is good. How assured I feel in those cases, when I agree with myself that what I'm doing at any particular time is what I think I should be doing. I've heard this indecision is a characteristic of Libras. They "weigh" things. More like, debate things from completely opposite viewpoints inside their head before making any decision. I debate things up to the wire. When my insides can't come to an agreement, I seek outside signs. Omens. Both sides can be swayed in the case of an omen. But if that doesn't happen, it's just a regular old debate. Like at "junior high" speech and debate competitions, both sides come to the table with their photocopied articles; trimmed and glued to note cards. When one side of me wins, the other gratefully concedes, and the creature of self can regain momentum. It sucks to lose momentum over lack of decision. Decision is important, its a great thing we have as creatures of self. Maybe I just need to decide who I want to be and live up to it.